Guilt

February 27th, 2008 by Fullforce | Posted in Gaming, Thoughts |

I decided I’d play some old games once more. I turned my TV on, and set up the Xbox, and grabbed a bunch of old games. (I’d play the PS2, but that’s so old and decrepit it takes 3 hours to see that it’s got a disc inserted. I want to play XIII, though. I’ve got that on PS2 somewhere.)

I started with Brothers In Arms: Road to Hill 30. One of my most favourite games when it was released, unfortunately it hasn’t aged particularly well in the next-gen world. Blocky, robotic, and bland, the voice acting seemed boring. It’s nothing compared to the delights of today’s gaming. (As a side note, I can’t wait for Hell’s Highway).

It’s much touted realism and true-to-life-ness fell on it’s face - I’ve been reading D-Day, by Stephen Ambrose, and that’s what partially made me go back and play this game, to see if it matches D-Day as well as I remember it doing the first time I played it. Unfortunately, it doesn’t. Too much time is skipped to get a real sense of when and where you are, even if where and when you are is accurate and true to what happened in real life.

Then I moved on to Mercenaries: Playground of Destruction. Like BiA, this hasn’t stood the test of time really, either. It’s still a hell of a lot of fun, though, and I can’t wait for Mercs 2.

After perusing some more, I settled on Second Sight. Unlike the previous two games, I didn’t play this one much the first time I played it. I got about halfway through and gave up, through the sheer impossibility of the game. However, playing it today felt like a new experience. I remembered some bits from before, but most of it still felt new. And I’m enjoying it more this time around, too. It’s got a great storyline, great graphics, and is real fun to play.

And this is where the ‘Guilt’ title comes from. In one of the early levels (3rd level or so) in a cutscene, you kill a guard with a psi attack by accident, and he smashes into a desk, flying over it. You can then access his computer, access the map, etc etc. But there’s something there I never saw the first time I played it through 3/4 years ago.

Closing the window on the computer screen gives you some applications, one of which is a messenger program. You open it, and it connects, rather like an IRC program, and suddenly you’re looking at a chat. Two people, talking, and you’re reading the chatlog. As you read, it becomes more and more clear that of the chatlog you’re reading, one of the participants was the guard you just killed.

The other participant sees you join the chat once more, and begins to talk to you. ‘Bunny’, as she is called, is obviously desperate to talk to the guard. As you read the chat and her comments, you come to the sudden realisation that this is the guard’s girlfriend or wife.

And now, powerless to reply, she begins typing messages, asking why you’re not talking, is there something wrong… and although I’m sure it was meant as a joke, and nothing more than an easter egg I suddenly came to the stark realisation that I felt guilty for killing the guy.

Although it was not my choice, as it was part of a cutscene, I thought to myself that I would still have killed him no matter if I had been given the choice or not. This person had a life, a girlfriend, and I’d taken that away. What of the many other guards I killed trying to get to this point?

This was the first time a game has made me feel guilty about killing something that was part of a game, (Aside from the Weighted Companion Cube, of course.) a non-existent entity, something not real nor made of substance. He didn’t really have a life outside of the cutscene, but I still took that life away just like any other anonymous enemy.

Just something I thought I’d share. Have you had a similar experience? Have you ever felt guilty after killing an enemy, either an enemy AI, or a real live player?

Best be off now, I’ve got more anonymous guards to fling across the room using my mind.